Sammy puts the beer down beside me and retreats into her smile, folding herself up on to the chair, compliantly pliant. She’s so young. I want to suck out her innocence and smear it over my decaying life. I don’t look at her while we’re talking so I don’t have to think about it. She tells me about herself and I dredge up comparable miseries, silt covered adolescent syndromes, dirty and malnourished things that look better deteriorated. Don’t worry about me, I tell her halfheartedly pained, I always make the most out of the worst that I can find.
this is my new favorite. “I want to suck out her innocence and smear it over my decaying life.” and ” I always make the most out of the worst that I can find.” I can’t even deal with how great that is.
You’re so sweet Jennifer. It seems like you’re at your most supportive when I feel like I’m being bleak and miserable. Thanks as always
I’m so glad! Maybe it’s because I resonate in many ways with the products of those bleak and miserable moods